The Don's election campaign was officially launched yesterday with much fanfare and the obligatory bow tie logo. Each campaign is limited to spending HK$9.5 million each and The Don will avoid "money politics" by limiting donations to HK$100,000 per person. He won't have any trouble getting to the limit. The limit backs up my assertion this will be the most expensive election in history. With only 800 voters the limit allows The Don to spend HK$11,875 (about US$1,500) per voter! Now that's money politics.

With the two other candidates proving ineffective, it's time for Plan B. Back on Friday, May 14th 2004 Hemlock declared himself a candidate for Legco in 2008. Eagerly assisted byJohn Swaine he even had stickers designed for the purpose. But surely now is Hemlock's time. He even has a platform of sorts:

First, tough policies to eradicate some of Hong Kong’s serious mental health problems, including Hello Kitty mobile phones, Nicholas Tse, the skin-whitening mania, the Liberal Party and the small white carpets placed at odd angles in office doorways to hinder bad influences in S-Meg Tower. Second, repatriation incentives for expats who don’t belong, including more roadworks, faster-closing elevator doors, a TV ban on the European Tiddlywinks championships, louder TVs on buses, demolition of Discovery Bay and introduction of huge taxes on such delicacies as cornflakes, BacoBits and Cheez Whiz, faster than you can say “world city”.

Hemlock for Chief Executive!

Update

As if you need further proof of Hemlock's intricate understanding of Hong Kong:

Hong Kong’s hard-working, tax-paying middle class eagerly debates the differences between the democratic systems of European countries and Hong Kong. “So let’s get this straight,” Mr Chiu the lawyer asks me. “In France and Holland they vote first, then the next day they find out the result?” I assure him that this is exactly how they do it. He shakes his head doubtfully. “I prefer our system. Announce the result first, then have the election. That way, everyone knows who to support.”