June 17, 2004

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Hong Kong, June 17th (Reuters) - Panic hit a 21st floor apartment on Hong Kong Island this morning when nothing happened.

"I was sleeping soundly, having been woken several times early in the night. JC half-fell out of bed again and PB had a coughing fit. By midnight all seemed well and Mrs M and I enjoyed 7 continuous hours of sleep. And that was the problem," said Simon, hunter-gatherer and main (albeit only) man of the house.

Simon told this reporter he has not used an alarm clock in over 3 years, since the birth of his first daughter JC. Typically his daughters wake at 6am or earlier but today was different. Simon explains, "At first I thought it was the regular time, about 6am. Imagine my surprise when Mrs M rolled over and told me, 'Holy sh!t, it's 7am.'"

This represents a massive sleep-in for Simon and Mrs M, soon expecting their third child. Mrs M continues, "It was one of those pleasant surprises, like when you find some money in a coat pocket or when Simon actually notices my haircuts."

Experts were divided as to whether this signalled the start of a trend. "Traditionally we see children start to sleep longer as they age," said Professor I. Made Up of America's Pacific Internet University*. "By the time they are teenagers you have the opposite problem: getting them out of bed at a normal hour." However Dr. Raving Loony of Stammers Unversial Healing Centre said, "I blame the parents. Kids watch too much TV and there's too much violence. Not like my day. Bring back Rocky and Bullwinkle and the original Batman series. Would you like to buy some tea-tree oil?"

Searches of historical records have found this is only the second time the magical '7:00am' has been reached, excepting jet-lag or drug-induced sleep. Celebrations were cut short, however, as Simon madly rushed to make the bus for work. Nevertheless the obligatory milk bottles were handed to the somnolent children to reward them for their efforts.

* Degrees available at reasonable prices.

posted by Simon on 06.17.04 at 11:25 AM in the




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Comments:

I think the SCMP has gone too far this time. Bring back Mao

posted by: da on 06.17.04 at 12:10 PM [permalink]

Heartedly disagree with this 'da' person. More stories of this nature should be in the SCMP, though I would have to question the source of some quotes. 'Da' shouldn't pooh-pooh such quality reporting.

posted by: paul on 06.17.04 at 12:53 PM [permalink]

Isn't that so cool? We get that about 50% of the time now. Sleep kicks ass.

posted by: Jim on 06.18.04 at 12:29 AM [permalink]




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